Hail Plankton

[Joe Fulton]

Well, first of all I have an admission.  Susan and I have been hiding our true purpose from Theosophers for over two years now and it's time to come clean.

Like many other prophets and saints (and a few drifters) we have been hiding the seeds of a new, powerful religion and now it is time to give the divine revelation to all.

It is PLANKTON.

Hail Plankton, drifter of grace, bottom of the food chain and sustainer of all.  Like many churches we have much that has to be taken on faith...if you want to expend that much effort, which probably isn't a good idea.

To get a clearer picture of Plankton, let's consult the holy gospel of Wikipedia.

There are no sins, aside from the worship of Nekton deities, or being born in the sign of Pisces.  In addition, living the wisdom of Plankton is accomplished by sleeping or otherwise drifting in large pools of water and not getting eaten by whales, shrimp, or anything else that propels itself.

For anyone who may aspire to becoming the Plankton Pope, forget it.  That position is taken by our youngest son, Justin, who exemplifies the best qualities found in Plankton and functions in that capacity quite well.  However, it may be useful to know that priests and priestesses are rotated in and out on a floating basis.

All scriptural references may be found by going to Stumbleupon and selecting the "Stumble" button.

Worship services are found anywhere you can float.  Otherwise pretending that you're floating works just as well.

And with that...

Hail Plankton
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Hail Plankton

[Joe Fulton]

There is some news to report from the eternal sea of Plankton.

First we have a new high priestess of Plankton, in addition to Susan.  There will be a ceremony at the Neptune Society in Tucson to consecrate an official pair of fuzzy dice and induct Carol Edwards as a high priestess of Plankton.  The fuzzy dice will be the official seal of all priests and priestesses of Plankton.

Susan Thomas will officiate.

Hail Plankton

[Joe Fulton]

And here is the official certificate and holy objects bequeathing the status of High Priestess of Plankton:

http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=2213506851371&set=a.2213...

[Wadjet]

Hahah!    good stuff !

Hail Plankton

 

[Joe Fulton]

A note sent to the Neptune Society:

A bit of humor to brighten your day.

Several years ago, my wife and I were driving down Grant St. and we passed the Neptune Society.  For some reason unknown to us we looked at each other and simultaneously said to each other "PLANKTON".

Thus, from the Neptune Society a religion was born.

Now every weekend we drive by the Neptune Society and each of us say five "Hail Plankton's" and touch the fuzzy dice on the mirror of our charcoal grey 2006 Chevy Colorado pickup (with a cap).

From this epiphany, several others around the world have been inducted into this faux-religion and now the sounds of "Hail Plankton" can be heard from the US to France, India and beyond.  See the full story at::  http://theosnet.ning.com/forum/topics/hail-plankton.

It's meant to be funny and a farce.  Sometimes the greatest joys in life come from the unexpected.  After all who would have thought that two people driving down Grant would have said the same thing at the same time without any prior thought.

Here's to you and hopefully this will bring smiles to everyone who works at the Neptune Society.

Joe Fulton

[Joe Fulton]

Also, one important point of liturgy is that no ordinary fuzzy dice are used.  We only use the best from Auto Zone, the official supplier of Plankton fuzzy dice.

[J. E. Mead]

what about the HumPBack whale.....

[Joe Fulton]

The Humpback Whale is a Nekton, which in the Plankton Universe is considered the Anti-Plankton.

[Deb]

Ha!  This certainly gave me a good laugh.  I'm all for the sleeping &/or floating in large pools of water, etc.  Sounds to me like the perfect way to seek the Deity, enlightment, whatever is your cup of tea.  

[J. E. Mead]

Hail Plankton!!  Omni Plankthi !!!

Part 1; Sutra 1: "Now is the time for the final exposition of Plankthi"

[Joe Fulton]

Sounds like it's time to get another set of fuzzy dice.